I don’t go to the mall very often. I don’t like shopping in crowded places like that where everybody shops. It’s all the same, you saw a mall you’ve seen them all. Plus almost everything there is expensive, and most of the times ugly, low quality and kitsch (still at a high price thou).
Well, what annoys me most about the Mall is… the kiosk vendors. I hate them! Sorry, nothing personal. You might be really cool if I get to know you. Actually, I take it back. I don’t hate you. I hate your damn job! Your job description is “annoying people at a maximum level, so they get to a point where they’re so frustrated they’ll buy anything to get away from you”.
Guess what? I had a job like this. I figured I’d work part time in a mall kiosk to make some extra money. Kiosk vendors aren’t paid, they just make a commission from what they sell everyday. The boss gives you a “script” you have to learn, and then you’re “taught” you have to be very aggressive, or else… you’ll go home with having wasted your time for nothing, and if it happens too often you’ll be fired. I kept the “job” for 2 days. Told my boss I couldn’t do it, it just wasn’t for me.
You can understand why they’re so aggressive, they have to make a sale, no matter what. I understand that… But… I got a job at McDonald’s after “quitting” the kiosk position. It was waaay better. Why can’t they do that? Who wants to annoy people for a living and have an insecure income that’s totally dependent on other people?
I know some folks just can’t say “no” to persuasive people, even if they know in the back of their minds that they’re being cheated into buying something useless, that they don’t need, for a higher price than normal. Not me. Actually, although I have a phobia of this kiosk aggressive vendors, I have to admit I enjoy saying “no” to them! Really, I don’t think they get such a blunt response from too many people, judging from the stunned looks on their faces.
Walking by a kiosk, a woman starts yelling at me: “Miss, miss! Can I see your nails? Show me your nails! Let me see them!” I don’t stop, nor walk faster. Keep my cool and my regular pace. She follows me: “Do you have fake nails? Can you show it to me?”. I turn around and say : “No, thank you”.
What annoys me most is when they touch your skin, your hair, or take your hand to give their “expert” opinions about how dull your hair is, or how ugly your nails are. “Oh, your hair feels so dry! Come over here for a second, you will love this!” “It’s the freaking desert Ma’am, my hair will look dry when it has no water in it, if you see me after a shower than it will be wet. But only for a minute, you see, this freaking Vegas weather tends to dry it fast! And if by dry you meant to say it’s ugly, your’s isn’t better. In fact, I think you got a wig on! How are you gonna advertise for something that you obviously don’t use? Oh, you do use it? It didn’t do you much good. You might wanna go to Walmart and buy a bottle of Pantene and a bottle of olive oil. Under 10 bucks”.
I never said that. I got no time or reason to argue. I just walk away and firmly say “NO, thank you”. Sometimes I have to add: “Not interested, thank you”. It’s trickier when they approach you with the question “are you from Vegas?”. Usually these people try to sell you time shares or other stuff like that, but I always avoid to answer, I just say “Not interested” or “Why?”. They don’t expect that. “Why? It doesn’t matter where I’m from, I don’t know you, why are you asking me personal questions?”. Sometimes they ask you “can I ask you a question?”. Don’t play their game. Just say “I’m not interested”. You don’t have to feel bad about being blunt, they are also, you have to with them.
The saddest part about it is that I , for one, (and I’m sure many others) would wanna go to those little kiosks and look at the products, and maybe even buy some, if it wasn’t for the aggressiveness of the vendors. They just make me wanna run away, I know that if I’ll be heading that way and start looking at the products they’ll never leave me alone! So I just avoid them.
If I was the owner of a kiosk like that I wouldn’t want to scare away the customers, or chase after them, but make them come to me. You can do that by selling quality, affordable products, with a great presentation and a charismatic vendor. NOT a pushy, extremely rude vendor!
At one time I was in the mall with somebody that immediately fell into the vendor’s trap. She put salt on his hand and start rubbing, saying this and that, how good the product was… I stayed there because of him, and she began putting salt on my hand too. After a while he asked me what I thought, I said “I don’t want to buy it. I don’t need it. It’s too expensive. You can buy stuff like this a lot cheaper.” I was very blunt, but I didn’t care. The girl was looking mad, and we walked away.
Hihihi! It’s my guilty pleasure to mess with the mall vendors! Just think about it, they piss you off, so why not do it in return? Maybe that’s the solution to ending mall-kiosk-phobia and getting rid if these pests! Mess with them! Drive them crazy! It’s perfectly legal and I promise it will feel good. They want to show you something? Go along with them for the sake of it and after a 15 minute presentation just say “I changed my mind, I don’t want to buy anything! Besides it’s too expensive, you think I’m made of money?” It’ll drive them crazy. So what? They drove you crazy for 15 minutes. Payback is a mother… Plus, if everybody did it maybe they’d finally quit and get a real job.
I found out, to my surprise, that there are other people out there just as annoyed as me! Go figure! One of the articles you can read about people dealing with mall-kiosk-phobia is this http://www.fashionparamedic.com/2007/11/carnies-at-mall-open-letter-to.html